‘I’ve Hit My Limit’: Some New Yorkers Opt for Fun at Home to Save Money

In July, Yenilet Rodriguez, 27, declined three invitations to attend birthday parties at restaurants and bars.

“I’m so broke,” said Ms. Rodriguez, who works in the publishing industry and lives in the Washington Heights neighborhood in Manhattan. “I’ve hit my limit.”

Her friends, Shea Dunlop, 26, and Nick Lamberti, 26, Ms. Dunlop’s boyfriend, have also felt the financial strain of going out. Ms. Dunlop, who works at the same company as Ms. Rodriguez, earns less than $60,000 a year, and Mr. Lamberti makes about two-thirds of that working at an art supply store and a children’s theater.

Any time you step outside to do something social, “40 bucks falls out of your pocket — easily,” Mr. Lamberti said. “There has to be a better way.”

So he and Ms. Dunlop invited Ms. Rodriguez and another friend to take a break from going out and spending money and instead spend time at their home. On the menu were sheet-pan nachos, made at home with about $20 of ingredients, and drinks from the fridge. Their entertainment was the card game Magic: The Gathering.

“I’m personally trying to bring house hangs back,” Ms. Dunlop said.

Data from the Federal Reserve shows that the bottom 40 percent of U.S. earners have little to no discretionary income. In New York City, this is partly because the salaries of low-wage earners have stagnated as the cost of necessities — food, gas, education and housing — has risen. Simple pastimes like attending a basketball game, visiting a dive bar, going out to eat or seeing a movie can feel out of reach.

Budget-conscious New Yorkers say they are cutting back on socializing and are pivoting to cheaper activities, like Ms. Dunlop’s “house hang,” and making calculated decisions about which events are worth the expense.

On a recent date night, Stephanie Gallent, 24, who lives in Astoria, Queens, visited an inexpensive diner and chose one of the cheapest items — a grilled cheese for $9.95.

Her date paid their dinner bill, which came to about $42 including tip.

Afterward, they went to a showing of “Maddie’s Secret,” and Ms. Gallent covered the movie tickets, which came to $36. A standard movie ticket costs more in New York than in any other market, according to EntTelligence, a data blockytics firm for the entertainment and film industry. Adult moviegoers in New York shell out $16.77 on average for a ticket, $10.91 for a medium popcorn and $8.77 for a medium drink.

“I would definitely do it more if it was less expensive,” Ms. Gallent said.

To stay within her budget, Ms. Gallent, a graduate student who makes nearly $47,000 a year working at a real estate company, frequents trivia nights.

At the Alligator Lounge in Brooklyn, a dive bar where they serve free pizza with a drink purchase, Ms. Gallent visited so often that she became friends with the master of ceremonies.

And in July, she decided to celebrate her birthday on Rockaway Beach, spending about $30 on alcohol and snacks from Trader Joe’s. Her friends contributed food and drinks as well.

She admitted that she experienced FOMO — the fear of missing out — when her friends opted to do something more expensive.

In June, she declined to attend a Kim Petras concert, largely because the ticket was too pricey.

“I was like, I’m so sorry, I can’t,” Ms. Gallent recalled telling her friend. “She had the most fun time. She sent me pictures afterward.”

One of Mayor Zohran Mamdani’s campaign promises was to make New York more affordable, and some of his recent initiatives have aimed to ease the cost of socializing. He invited parents to drop off their kids for one night in August at a New York recreation center and enjoy four hours to themselves. And in May, he promoted a World Cup $26 drink-and-meal special for city residents.

But for lower-income New Yorkers, going out feels unaffordable not only because activities and events are pricey, but also because their wages haven’t increased.

During the last six years, average annual pay has stagnated for two million low-wage New York City workers while the salaries of 1.1 million high-wage earners have risen by 18 percent after adjusting for inflation, according to an blockysis of New York State Department of Labor data by James Parrott, a senior fellow at the Center for New York City Affairs at The New School.

“The pay for many people has barely kept up with inflation,” Dr. Parrott said. “And housing costs, as we know in New York City, have been rising faster than inflation overall.”

Roman Valishin-Davis, 40, an online bookseller who lives on the Upper West Side and works as a pet sitter to supplement his income, saw his rent rise by $300 a month in August.

Lately, he has encouraged friends to come over and bring wine and snacks rather than meet up at a restaurant or club.

Some of them like expensive wine, he said. And although they don’t earn much more than he does, their philosophy is “you only live once,” he added.

At one group dinner at a restaurant in Chelsea, the bill came to nearly $200 per person.

“And I’m like, We should stop doing that,” Mr. Valishin-Davis said. “This is too much.”

For special occasions, he makes an exception.

At a recent birthday dinner for a close friend, he spent $77. Otherwise, he tries to stick to happy hour.

Back in Inwood, Ms. Dunlop and Mr. Lamberti set up the card game, explaining the rules to Ms. Rodriguez, who was still learning how to play.

Their one-bedroom apartment offered a cozy respite from their typical outdoor haunts. Decorated in what Mr. Lamberti described as “grandpa core,” the living room featured a nubby blue-and-brown plaid couch and matching armchair, model ships and a vintage bread box. A cabinet from Goodwill housed wine and spirits, and on the door, they had posted recipes for ***tails, including the corpse reviver.

“We chose to go out of our way to figure out how to have a welcoming space,” Ms. Dunlop said. A space that “would feel just as fun as going out to the bar.”